eh...

Have you ever noticed how people change after a simple phone conversation? Take my mother, for example. Before the phone convo, she was fine, not problems with anything. Then, during this convo, she begins to treat me like I'm an idiot, like I disagree with everything she says. Post-convo, everything I do, say, or think is wrong. What the hell am I supposed to do!?! It's like I'm supposed to be the fucking brain child, the perfect one. I don't even know what the fuck I'm supposed to do or say around them anymore. I can't be perfect, I can't be the fucking brain child they want. Why can't they accept that? I'm gaining weight because I worry about if what I've done or said was perfect enough for them. Even if I try, it's never good enough. I just want to graduate college with a good enough GPA to get the fuck out of here and live in Russia. They refuse to fly over water, so I know they'll never come find me, and they're so goddam cheap they'd never call (not like I'd give them the number). People are so fucking controlling it's unreal. And expectations? Why does everything have to be perfect? Why can't anything just exist, just be? I just wish I could read minds, then I wouldn't disappoint them like I do. Maybe then I'd be good enough.

Bachlorette Party!

Hello! Well, a few days ago, I attended a bachlorette party for a good friend of mine. That was great. The last party of this sort I went to sucked. We ended up fighting with guys about a hundred miles away while we were in Canada. This, fortunatly, wasn't like that. The night began with the usual, pizza, chips, drinks, ect. Then we got to the games. The first one involved Jello Shots. This was the first time I'd ever had a Jello Shot, and I never really liked Jello. I got away with only having to take 2 shots, so it worked out. Then, one of the girls informed me a stripper was on his way to the house. This guy stayed for over an hour, and that was an interesting experience. After he left, we went to Cactus Juice Saloon, which is a local bar for the cowboys and the cowboy wanna-bes. I was totally comfortable there, but no one else was. So we decided to leave and try getting into another local club, The Dollar. I was really happy we didn't even try to go in. The people in the line outside made me feel like I didn't belong there. Like I wasn't good enough to be in the same bar with them. I absolutly hate people like that, and yet, I go to school with many of those same people. Society revolves around this anorexic,heroine chick look, and it sucks ass. Shallow people need to be put in fat suits and made to walk around the city. Then they may know how it feels to be looked down on. People are horrible. But anyway. Overall, the bachlorette party was a success. More fun than the last one I went to, and that was in Canada, where it was legal for me to drink! Well, until next time, auf wiedersehn.